Monday, April 12, 2010

"When I Grow Up"


Almost from the time we learn to talk the phrase "when I grow up" is consistantly used. Whether it involves an occupation we hope to obtain, or the kind of person we want to be, it's a phrase that's constantly thought about.

I was in a car for almost 9 hours the other day, which of course means I had a lot of time to think. My brother was in the front seat and something came up about his 16th birthday being within the next month. All I could keep thinking about was how much older and more mature he's become. I'm definitely not ready for that...my mind flashes back to when he was just a few years old and was of course jealous that I was older. I remember him getting really frustrated, looking up at me and saying, "I can't wait until I grow up and be older than you." All I could do was laugh because of course we all know that isn't possible, but as a young child he did not. Oh how the times have changed. I'm so proud of the young man he has become. I know I'll see great things from him in the future.

I also began to think back to my past, such as when my grandmother, before she got sick, used to keep track of my growth on the wall of her pantry. When they had to move out of that house, that was probably the saddest part about it for me. She kept track of mine, my brothers, and cousins growth. It had to be the first thing accomplished when we came to visit. I miss her so much it hurts sometimes. Then my mind flashed to memeories such as those from middle school and high school. It doesn't seem quite so long ago, but it really has been quite some time. I'm proud to say that I'm still great friends with some of the same people that I met in middle and high school. Some people have faded from my life, but then again, that happens with everybody. I guess the true friends are here to stay. I'm truly blessed to have such wonderful friends in my life.

I'll be graduating in 2 years from college (maybe less). I'm going to be involved in an internship this summer and some of my writings are being published as I write this very blog. It's such a great feeling to see my name underneath a headline or caption. I'm proud of all I've accomplished, but sometimes I feel that life is passing me by and that maybe there should be a "pause" button for life every once in a while. I guess all I'm trying to say is that I'm not sure what's waiting for me out there, but I'm hoping I can embrace it and make it my own.

2 comments:

  1. Speaking of growing up...it amazes me sometimes how much you have grown up. I can't tell you enough how proud I am of the young woman you have become. It just seems like yesterday that you were wearing your little "Teety" windsuit and holding Teety like someone was going to take him.
    You have always been such a joy in my life. I love telling my friends about you and how proud I am of you.
    I have your beautiful senior picture in my office and everyone either says how much you look like me or they think it was a younger me. That is quite a compliment to me. I only hope that I have as much heart and compassion as you do. You are a blessing in my life and I love you very much!

    Dena

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  2. Well...I had to get my good qualities from somewhere! I'm just so thankful to have such wonderful role models in my life who have helped mold me into the person I am today! I love you!

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